Giving up the negativity

(This is by no means a religious blog, but the Lenten season has inspired me to set some new goals, so I hope you don’t mind the tangent.)

It was lucky that I started my day today with a VBarre class at Classic Pilates or I might never have had the time/energy to work out at all! The day flew by with barely time for a bathroom break, and I had so much stuff on my to do list and in my inbox that I was actually dismayed when the end of the day came. Had the time really gone by that fast? But I wasn’t done yet! Regardless of how much work I had left, though, tonight I couldn’t change my plans. It’s Ash Wednesday, so I needed to go to church. My online research didn’t yield any Catholic churches in the Dallas area that were doing services in English after 6:30pm (though oddly enough, there were tons of Spanish services later in the evening?), so an early dismissal was required.

Although I was being a somewhat good Catholic by going to church, I wasn’t fasting (in part because of my recent Food is Fuel mantra) and I also hadn’t figured out if I was going to give anything up for Lent. Like many people, I often use Lent as a time to give up something that will create a healthy change in my life (caffeine, alcohol, juice, etc) – kind of a second chance at New Year’s resolutions. I’ve heard many times that Lent really isn’t supposed to just be about giving something up; it’s also about adding good things to our lives. Unfortunately, this is something that I honestly often neglect when it comes to picking something for Lent.

For New Year’s this year, I took on the goal of completing one challenge a month. In January, I took on the challenge of adding a workout every single day – and am now continuing to do that through the end of March. For February, I’m working on giving up indulgent food portions and eating more moderately. I still wanted to do something for Lent, but it would have to be completely different than the health-related goals I had already set. Perhaps something more mental / happiness-related?

I’ve been pretty stressed out lately, and I’ve come to realize that lately I’ve gotten into the terrible habit of channeling that negative energy in bad ways. For example, there are a few people in my life that I have to interact with, but I have found myself hating our interactions, not having anything to say, and just wanting to get away. I’ve noticed this for a while, but for whatever reason, I haven’t bothered to care – instead making the unconscious choice to plow ahead with my to-do list instead of stopping to forge a friendship. Big oops to that one! I couldn’t figure it out, because I’m usually far from antisocial, until my friend Blake pointed out that perhaps I was taking out my frustration with other things on them – and that was why I couldn’t connect. Totally unfair of me, and something that definitely needs to be fixed. I don’t like how bitchy my thinking has become, and I’d love to change it.

So for Lent this year, I am giving up having negative/judgmental thoughts about those people, and I’m adding some relationship-building and connection-making. Blake reminded me that you can always find something in common with someone, and I’m kind of ashamed that I hadn’t bothered to figure out exactly what that is in this case. Time to get on it! I think making a conscious effort to be nicer will go a long way, and there’s an added bonus of it being something that my mental health has needed for a long time anyway. I don’t like disliking anyone! 🙂